We can't blame the review salesman too much . . . he got it from watching Sesame Street!
Lefty: Hey Author . . . come here! You look like a talented writer.
Author: I do?? Oh yeah, I do! Sure.
Lefty: You look like someone who'd be interested in boosting your book sales.
Author: I do?? Oh yeah, I do! Sure.
Lefty: You look like someone who'd be interested in boosting your book sales.
Author: Boosting sales? Sure, why not. Are you a salesman?
Lefty: Riiiiight.
Author: What do you sell?
Lefty: Reviews.
Author: Reviews like what authors are supposed to honestly get from readers! That's kind of a weird thing to be selling.
Lefty: Listen. Ya take this 5 star review here, see. It's very useful! Ya buy it . . . ya post it on your book site.
Author: Why should I buy it and post it on my site?
Lefty: The next time you feel like your sales are slumping . . . ya share the review! Or you tryna make a best selling list . . . dig the review! Or if another author is beatin' the pants offa ya in book sales . . . post a negative review to his book page. Now . . . ya wanna buy a review?
Kimberly T. Matthews
"I knew exactly how many condoms were left in his gym bag, in a little black box, wrapped in gold foil. Seven. Each time I randomly checked for no other reason besides I knew they existed, there'd always been seven. So I was taken aback that morning when I went to do his laundry, peeked in the box and only found three..."
Lisa from - "Lisa's Dress"
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